I was the first black child to be adopted into a white family 1970 Wichita, Kansas: beginning my racial trauma! I lived in neighborhoods that did not reflect me and people were cruel. At 16 years old I was a homeless runaway because the family that chose me, was broken and could not hold me, but I honor her for doing her best. And at 17, I was absolutely on my own. I was out there in the world by myself with no guide, no true home, no true village, no true direction and I abused myself. Isn’t that something? We forgive our abusers then spend the rest of our lives abusing ourselves.

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At 32 years old became a mommy, and at 34, I was homeless with my two-year-old as a result of abuse. How was I here again after being in the mud for so long and lifting myself out? I blamed myself for other people’s ugly. I felt I was not worthy. I did not think I was beautiful enough, smart enough or thin enough to be loved. I didn’t know love. How do you know love if you have never been loved? Now I know love, so I can answer that. I have never let all the pain go, but I sure learned how to manage it. I am brilliant, I am empowered and I am proud.

 

I have been a social worker, counselor, educator, trainer, coach and advocate for 35 years. I have an Associate of Arts degree in African-American studies, a Bachelor’s of Science degree in Criminal Justice with a focus on Human Services and a Master of Arts degree in Organizational Development with a focus on equity and inclusion. I did this as a social worker, working 40+ hours a week while solely raising a “spirited, challenging, difficult child” who got kicked out of school four out five days a week until he was almost 12 years old. But I climbed and I fought all while I was submerged in my addiction which resulted in me weighing almost 400 lbs. for 10 years of my life.

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I tell my story, not for pity, but for people to understand that no matter who you are, or where you are, you can be whoever you choose to be. You can and will become empowered and we will climb out together.

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Rooted in Buddhist principles, I believe in presence, compassion, and the healing power of stillness. Like water, we are meant to flow, adapt, and renew. The lotus blossom, a symbol of purity and rebirth, reflects the heart of my work:

No matter where you begin, you can rise beautifully.

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I created Solution Based Coaching to guide individuals, families, professionals, and entire communities toward empowerment and whole wellness—one solution at a time.